The big 30

I have officially reached the big 3 0 yesterday. 30. 30 years.i consider myself 26 since the first 4 years memories of my life is virtually non existent. My biological age tells my otherwise. My body age tells me im 28. So..im still young..even in health terms.

People achieve a lot of things going to 30. As for me, after puberty decided to knock on my 23rd birthday bearing gifts of acne and crater holes, i did not achieve a lot of so-called success. You know, the kind of success that the media sells you. Beautiful. Money. Car. A house. A perfect carrier. If success was measured by all the materialistic things i own, then I am just one poor motherfucker.

Yeah. I got a car. A basic 1.3ltr engine car. A house? No. But i got a home. Money? I got some coins stashed in my piggy bank and a job that i am trying to love but still cant find a passion to do so. I am in no way beautiful if measured by the society stds. And i just broke up with the one person i want to start a family with.

So..what is soo great about 2014 anyway? Well..I grow a small untended garden in my backyard.
I am thinner.
I read more and discover more.
I doodle more and discover myself in the process.
I jog more and found myself with nature.
I have lesser acne.
I am more comfortable in my own skin.
I discover myself. In the darkest hour, when no one was there. I found myself, spiritually.
It is my own personal achievement. To strive to be better than i was yesterday. To be a better person. To be kind.

You know, as cliche as it might sound, life is a journey. It is self discovery. I have seen better years. The thought of that memory makes me smile. Eventhough the people in that memory are no longer near me. I guess all good things are worth treasuring. Even from the ones who made u sad. Because at one point in life, these people did make you smile.

Along the way, people are going to say bad things about you. Have certain expectations from you. And might leave you. The most important thing is not to abandon who you are anf what you believe in. As for me, i believe i am a servant of Allah. A daughter. A sister. A doodler which hopes to be..
An entrepreneur
A happier person
And a better person.

Now

I am thankfull and content

That i am still converting oxygen to dioxides.

Thank you